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	SD! : Web boards : Practical IE : "when things stay the same" 1 2 when things stay the same (12) Moved from IE Theory Mon 18 Feb 08, 4:14 PM jakesemma US(WA), 14 mths  Do you think subs/slaves get nervous when things stay the same for to long, or don't "change" in ways that are obvious? (It came up in my I was bad thread...) and it occured to me how often do subs/slaves act out or do stuff when stuff stays the same or hasn't changed.... part of why I like this lifestyle is because there is constant progress and you can constantly see things hcanging, either forward or backwards, there's always progress, even if you back slide and have to start over a little... Do you think subs/slave might act out with out realizing it when the reigns need to be tightened? or when things get to comfortable? okay, does anyone else get what I am saying or do I need to spend a few hours trying to figure out how to word my question LOL Edited Mon 18 Feb 08, 5:14 PM by jakesemma 18 Feb 08, 7:31 PM little_linnet US, 3 yrs  Yeah, I think it ties in with what Raven was mentioning in another thread. We acclimate to the control we live under and it's not obvious to us anymore, it's just "how things are" even though to a vanilla person it would seem like an impossibly strict set of restrictions to live life under. I think the change is what helps keep us aware of the control we're under. Like bathwater stops feeling so warm once you've been in it for a while and then if you add a little more hot to it it feels warm again. Although I've noticed that if I deliberately cultivate awareness of the control Mr Linnet holds over me, I experience a different and really profound happiness from things staying the same. I get centered and settled into it in a way I really enjoy. Krista Resident Evil 4: Sure, there's a pretty young thing waiting for you in the barn .. but she's pitchforked to the wall. 18 Feb 08, 8:53 PM 453-295-258 US(LA), 22 mths  i am guilty of that. i find myself getting mouthy sometimes when things have gone smoothly for a while and i haven't felt the sting of the crop recently. i never mean to, and most times do not even realize it until after the fact. 18 Feb 08, 9:16 PM jakesemma US(WA), 14 mths  little_linnet wrote: Yeah, I think it ties in with what Raven was mentioning in another thread. We acclimate to the control we live under and it's not obvious to us anymore, it's just "how things are" even though to a vanilla person it would seem like an impossibly strict set of restrictions to live life under. I think the change is what helps keep us aware of the control we're under. Like bathwater stops feeling so warm once you've been in it for a while and then if you add a little more hot to it it feels warm again. Although I've noticed that if I deliberately cultivate awareness of the control Mr Linnet holds over me, I experience a different and really profound happiness from things staying the same. I get centered and settled into it in a way I really enjoy. Krista So, in otherwords, its good to add hot water to the bathtub occasionaly? or am I mis-understanding this post... (I think 1 cup of coffee wasn't enough today.) 18 Feb 08, 9:28 PM 775-971-069 UK, 3 yrs  Everyone loves a surprise, to be taken by the hand and then told to lay on, get in here, or whatever is all part of the fun, not know what might happen next , I love it . 18 Feb 08, 10:37 PM Red_Spark UK, 23 mths  jakesemma wrote: Do you think subs/slave might act out with out realizing it when the reigns need to be tightened? or when things get to comfortable? Absolutely. Is it topping from the bottom, or simply a way of communicating what they are feeling? That's the tricky bit to decide... 18 Feb 08, 10:41 PM masterfiremaam US(AZ), 2 yrs  Some people need to be reminded that they're being controlled just like other need to be reminded they're loved...and some people just simply thrive on drama. The two are totally different. Look at each separately and how they might be contributing here.. If you see this becoming a pattern, you'll soon learn how you feel when the trigger is getting near and you can simply ask your Master for a session or a reminder to avoid the trigger. Hmm...not sure if that made sense. I'm out of it today. *hack, cough, wheeze* Master Fire "Be excellent to each other." - Bill and Ted *air guitar* 22 Apr 08, 11:41 PM Tragopan US(CA), 16 mths  Yes, it seems that "acting out" is often a response to routine. The whole S&M dance is often powered by the tension created by the Master's will being imposed on the slave - when the slave's obedience has become routine, the tension seems to lessen. Think of change as an energy generator in the relationship. Keeping things fresh is always a good idea. 2 May 08, 7:49 AM Mistress_Jewel US(IA), 9 mths  I think we all go through those lulls, I call them the vanilla faze. Even though they may certainly not be vanilla, they are mundane and predictable. Sometimes life, work, etc gets in the way and we just get comfortable for a while. we re-group so to speak.I think this is normal in any setting or relationship. the important thing is to recognize it and get back into life and living it as soon as you do. A slave in particular needs the constant attention and reminders their owner gives. I agree that with out this the slave feels no choice but to create change since no one else is. Ms Jewel 5 May 08, 9:46 PM skylerpet US(ND), 12 mths  i think that in any relationship things can get stale. No matter if you're the most 1950's vanilla relationship if things get stale they just sit there and mold over. i myself really need spontaneity and creativity in my relationships. With mi Amo though, it is nice to just randomly feel His hand of control. i can totally understand acting out a bit, to spice things up. i've done it and probably will do it again <laughs> http://thiscatsmeow.bravehost.com/ http://kittypetskyler.wordpress.com/ ~~~~ Master allows me my posting privileges. He will deny and/or completely remove them as He sees fit. ~~~~ 9 Jun 08, 5:48 AM 143-983-458 US, 3 yrs  i certainly dont act out deliberatly, but i have noticed that without a certain amount of "reminding" i get a bit mouthy, and a few good swats on the ass seems to settle my attitude down. sometimes ive commented to Him that i seem a bit irritable and maybe i need a good whommping. its not that i want a spanking or whatever, it just seems to clear my head and get my head back on straight. i have no idea why a few good swats on the ass makes me calmer after a stressful day at work but it does. is this making sense to anyone? taking my pleasure in His picture=124612 Next page