This page sponsored by JT's Stockroom    [other banners]

	SD! : Web boards : Submission : "is it wrong?" 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 is it wrong? (96) This topic is now full - if you want to reply, please make a new post on the board itself. 4 Apr 08, 11:53 PM paul81255 NZ, 10 mths I agree- no master or mistress is perfect but we as slaves need to work out how to please. Women naturally want to use language to negotiate and change the situation while men have a idea they want to turn into their will. We as slaves need to learn submission and be willing and trusting having already decided that if our master or mistress gets things wrong well at worst they lose us; but they don't want that so it is up to us to work out how to get under their will and to be obediant to that. It begins with trust which leads to submission which then becomes obediance and we must learn so there is discipline and that may involve some sort of physical bondage but in our hearts we become bound to our master or mistress such that we worship them and trust them and on it goes love paul 5 Apr 08, 2:07 AM 791-864-918 14 mths It sounds like you already know the answer to this. Hitting with fists is considered abuse in any relationship, especially when it involves anger. my Sir makes a rule of not disciplining me when He is angry, because He knows He will behave differently when He is angry. you should seriously discuss this with your Master, because punching you because He is angry is really not appropriate. 5 Apr 08, 5:05 AM Master_Kevin1 US, 17 mths Y! Ok he is out of controll. Hitting out of anger is not a good sign. It is a prequil to you getting seriously hurt. The controll you give should be enough for him to see there is respect from you. You really need to take a close look at your relationship. Dont let your feelings cloud you rational. You could possibly be is a dangeious situation. A sub should never be struck out of anger ever. Master Kevin 8 Apr 08, 10:53 PM LLs_Angel US, 15 mths To control another person one must be in control. To allow another person to make you angry is to let them control and to lose your own control. With this being said, I feel. If my Lord is angry he is not in control and therefore will be unable to control me. If he was to hit, push, punch, etc me when he was angry i would do all in my effort to defend myself because to me he would not be in control so why would i accept him trying to control me. I am his slave because he is in control and therefore can control me. I do enjoy passion but no non controled passion. For me the difference in abuse and what we do is the person who is hitting me is in control. No Matter how much a person may seem to be in control of themself if they are angry they are not. I feel the same way as a parent i do not punish my child when i am angry. I wait till i have settled down and regained my control of myself before i try to control my child or teach him. Thug play .. is about hitting with fist, kicking, ETC but again it is done when the hitter is in control of himself. Just my 2 cents your's my be different and i respect that. LL's chained angel 9 Apr 08, 12:15 AM Eclectic1 US(ID), 13 mths Respect has to go both ways. It cannot be demanded rather it has to be earned and that does not happen over night. Actions of a physical or verbal nature should never be taken when done so out of anger. A good master must first learn to control himself before trying to control others. 9 Apr 08, 2:13 AM 870-373-522 UK, 14 mths From what i have read it sounds like you are into the lifestyle and he is not. Perhaps he thinks this is the way you wanted life? i dont meen that in any way against you. i used to be in a relationship with someone who did not understand the M/s way of life... she was a very controlling person but did not understand my need to be controlled. she thought i was obsessed with bondage and such rather then my need to please her. it would oftern be that i would have to get her angry to get any dominant responce from her. all in all the relationship i had was missrible... if he is 'too lazy' then he clearly does not want to be your master... someone who wants to be a Master, an owner is someone who wants (in my eyes at least) to make his slave perfect for him. and that would imply training her. maybe i'm jumping to conclutions, but from expereance I know once you are out.. once you find yourself someone who does truely want you from the slave you are you will be so very happy. sounds like a fairy tale i know but i found him so i dont see why you cant. there is no excuse for abuse in any relationship. Punishment is one thing... you punish your dog if it pee's in the corner or rips up the cusions, you punish your child if it does something wrong.. but you NEVER abuse it/them... an animal you own is your property... you would not abuse your dog.. so why abuse your slave. I hope it all works out for you in the future, every one deserves a happy life... you just have to go out there and make sure you have one... dont let some one you are unhappy with spoil it. you might have commited to being his slave, but at the end of the day.. if you are unhappy you can not make him happy so where is the point? loving slave of Master Zphantom 16 Apr 08, 6:01 PM DomMaster 12 mths 028-811-470 wrote: is it wrong? there are times when Master gets very angry with me and will become physical. He will cover my mouth if i am speaking and He feels that i need to "shut up" and proceed to back my into a corner literally and get in my face. He also tends to punch me in my arm with full force when i cause Him to get angry. i find this scary. Master tells me that if i cant handle a 24/7 relationship i shouldn't have asked for it. but that makes me think, would You punch in You car window if it ran out of gas, no , so why would a Master act like this towards His slave? Master says that if i dont respect Him first He will not respect me...isnt it suppose to be the other way around. How can i respect Him if He says " I'm too lazy to train you" making me beg Him to write a list of rules for me , making Him annoyed and writing it out. i think here is a what the fuck that factor that goes into all of this. i dont want to Master myself gerrr. so what Y/your opinions on all of this this ? thank you for Y/your responses. vixen ( the slave name that is never said) vixen This sounds like abuse to me. Just like MasterLT stated a Master should never discipline out of anger. Your Master has some anger management issues that need to be addressed. Was he like this when you first met? 16 May 08, 9:25 PM 913-898-746 UK, 8 mths a master slave relationship is that you both agree boundaries if your master breaks this . then stop and find a new master that is all you dream off to rule you 31 May 08, 1:55 AM 000-446-713 US(KY), 4 yrs Y! shyfox wrote: So a master always has to be kind and loving to qualify as a master? Is it unheard of to have a little controlled anger play? I thought the true mark of someone in control is not that they don't experience emotions but that they can control their actions in the context of those emotions. No, a Master does not always have to be kind to be a Master. There is nothing wrong with any consentual play. However, nothing in the OPs description sounds like 'controlled anger'. It sounds like, 'lost my temper anger'. Someone who will hit their domestic partner when they do not have control of themselves is dangerous. As a general rule, if you have to ask, 'Am I being abused?' or 'Am I drinking too much?' or 'is this cheating?' or 'Do these jeans make my ass look fat?' or any simular question... if you are asking the question, the answer is yes. (except the last one. the answer there is, 'It ain't the jeans.') This abuser is using a standard line in the lifestyle that an abuser is going to love to adopt... 'it's what you signed on for.' How often on boards do we hear people ask 'Did you negotate this?' the answer is - who gives a fuck? If you forgot to negotate it, do so now. If you signed on for it and it is seriously not working for you, time to reopen negoations. When someone is your partner, on either side, and you try to tell them you are not getting your needs met - you are getting hurt - whatever - and they don't care and don't listen, it is time to think about leaving. This is not a 'leave at the first sign of trouble' advice. This is - don't stay when, after trying to correct things, you hear that things ain't gonna change and theres nothing you can do about it and they don't care about your needs. There is something you can do. Leave. In the case of someone who is willing to lash out physically in anger, the answer is - leave while you still can. get help if you need it, and get out. And, no, i do not know this is the case for the OP. Only the OP knows that. But there is no 'deserve'. The story on here of the woman with the black eye because she went threatening her partner with a knife - in that case, it doesn't matter who does the leaving, but it is still abuse, even if mutual, and someone needs to leave, before someone wakes up dead. 5 Jun 08, 7:25 AM Chartreuse 11 mths What the OP mentions is only a snap-shot of the relationship, it would be silly to give advice or to make judgements based only on what has been written. If abuse occurs within your relationship and if you're unhappy you have to decide if it's what you want.... As others have said - only you know if your relationship is what you want or is one you would rather be free of. C x Next page