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	SD! : Web boards : IE Theory : "Why is it so hard?" 1 2 3 Why is it so hard? (29) 25 Mar 08, 10:52 PM slave2master US, 2 yrs Life_of_Vassalage wrote: Why is it so hard? If being a slave is what a person truly wants, why do some talk of how hard it is and the challeges they face? Shouldn't it be easy? I think some people force themselves to be someone they're not in order to be with their Master. And, if you are submissive by nature, it should be pretty cut and dry.....right? Just something I often ponder. Natasha P.S. Why do our minds have to analyze everything to the point that we HAVE to have labels? How can you generalize if no two of us are alike? Again, just something to get the thought process moving....hope no one takes offense. I love other people's opinions!! i certainly understand your question, but being submissive is not always easy. i am submissive. i am a slave, actually...and it is definitely my nature to serve and to please my Master. But it is His job to stretch my limits and help me to grow in ways that i may have never even imagined. The easy part is the mental attitude that wants to please and obey. The difficult part is always carrying through with what my Master wants from me...putting His will first. Sometimes it means facing my fears and facing one's fears is never an easy thing. With any kind of growth comes some discomfort. Being a slave, i am in a constant state of growth. So it is anything but easy. 28 Mar 08, 10:09 PM 731-421-706 US, 2 yrs Y! Life_of_Vassalage wrote: Why is it so hard? If being a slave is what a person truly wants, why do some talk of how hard it is and the challeges they face? Shouldn't it be easy? I think some people force themselves to be someone they're not in order to be with their Master. And, if you are submissive by nature, it should be pretty cut and dry.....right? Just something I often ponder. Natasha P.S. Why do our minds have to analyze everything to the point that we HAVE to have labels? How can you generalize if no two of us are alike? Again, just something to get the thought process moving....hope no one takes offense. I love other people's opinions!! my Master often says that the stronger person in a Dominant/submissive or Master/slave relationship is the submissive/slave. He says this is because of the level of trust the submissive/slave has to have in their Dominant/Master. it also takes a lot of self-confidence for someone to be able to put themself into such a position of lower status. Oddly enough, becoming His slave has enormously increased my self-confidence. i have always been very naturally submissive. He has helped me to not only accept it, but embrace it and in many ways be proud of it. Of course, any person who speaks to Him about what a D/s relationship requires is very quickly told that it actually requires a great deal of both trust and respect from *both* parties because it's not really D/s if the Dominant is merely using fear/inimidation to get what they want from the submissive person. i know that in our 4 1/2 year relationship He and i both have grown as has the amount of trust we have in each other. He and i have both opened up a lot of fantasies that had been kept hidden from every other partner either of us had ever had. 731-421-706 28 Mar 08, 10:22 PM paul81255 NZ, 10 mths It is very difficult because of all of our prior experience and conditioning. Turn this on it's head- Why did an angry God destroy all those Israel people who came out of Egypt and only and a entirely new generation went into Palestine? The answer lies in the stiff (knecked) thinking of the people who had onlt known being kicked around and ordered to do things and therefore were terrified of the challanges that an entirely new apporach to life would bring. The prevailing culture of civisation has brough us to a certain set of assumptions and ways of thinking- becoming a slave goes against most of that and thus is both internally and externally a costly step...but entirely worthwhile. lots of love paul 10 Aug 08, 4:16 AM slave_joy US(NC), 3 yrs Y! Being a slave is the easiest and most natural thing i have ever done. It's what i was made for. When i have tried to live a so-called "normal" life and be a "regular" girl friend/wife/lover/ect. and deny my need to be enslaved, that is when things were difficult for me. It didn't feel right to me. i felt like i was a square peg trying to force myself into a round hole and it just didn't work for me. i will never again try to be something i'm not. i am a slave and always will be. joy, Owned servant of Master David, North Carolina (since 21 NOV 2005) 10 Aug 08, 6:57 PM 124-745-211 US, 14 mths Master has given me only two fundamental rules or things that He expects of me. 1) total and complete honesty at all times in any & every situaiton. 2) 100% effort at all times, regardless of any other factor. Sounded soooooo simple the day these were explained to me. the honesty i have not really had a hard time with. However, giving my all and knowing that nothing less but all is acceptable? It seems to be one of the hardest parts of my slavehood. This frustrates me because i thought it was just so simple. This is the life i ache to live, it has taken me a lot of tears and long nights of contemplation, but there had been a point where He truly did hold all the power in my life. In another post i have asked for help with surrender. Perhaps i have forgotten who i am and what i am? i know that when i start analyzing Masters commands and questioning His authority, i am in BIG trouble. 28 Aug 08, 1:31 AM 493-966-682 US(WI), 6 mths Y! It can be hard at times, when i am upset and i don't want to be in this power exchange for a moment, and i do not want to do something Master has ordered. But i have found that though i am occasionally bitter or upset, the good feelings of being with my Master, and serving him far outweigh the bad. Evan's kitten. 28 Aug 08, 5:15 AM kashta US, 9 mths Y! It's not easy (at times) because we place another person at the center of our universe - all the while knowing we've given that person not only the power to command us but to also destroy us. This goes well beyond our inability to leave of our own free will. Our happiness, security, and well being is solely dependent upon another person who is fallible simply because he or she is human. We can be deceived; he or she can make mistakes. Add to this the fact that we (each) continue to grow and to change. This may bring us closer together or we may drift apart. Through the many disappointments we've faced in our life experiences, we've learned how rare it is to find someone who can truly handle the responsibility they bear for us. To rely on another person so completely puts us in great risk should we discover later on that we've made a poor choice. 1 Sep 08, 3:02 PM slavegail UK, 3 yrs Y! written with permission of NG1. no it is not cut and dry. i am a slave first my life made me this way i accept it need it want it. but sometimes when Owners punish slave she wishes she was not one when master or Mistress uses slave sexually and slave is not in the mood she wishes she was not one has slave thourgh of leaving yes will she no slave knows shwe cannot look after herself she would be a in trouble in days not weeks life is not always so black and white. permission of get off soapbox Master. slavegail Property of NG1 4 Sep 08, 12:05 AM Master_BLUs_pet US, 10 mths Y! Life_of_Vassalage wrote: Why is it so hard? If being a slave is what a person truly wants, why do some talk of how hard it is and the challeges they face? Shouldn't it be easy? I think some people force themselves to be someone they're not in order to be with their Master. And, if you are submissive by nature, it should be pretty cut and dry.....right? Just something I often ponder. Is anything ever cut and dry? i have been submissive all my life. Does that mean i always liked it? Does that mean i haven't ever fought against it? A lifetime of being defensive in order to protect yourself against users and deceivers? Sometimes that is hard to erase. To give yourself totally to One person is not an easy thing to do and it's still not. It is a struggle at times within myself. Just because i am submissive does not mean i always want to do what my Master tells me to. It is sometimes hard to go by rules that are made by Someone and knowing you can not break them unless you want to be disciplined. Don't get me wrong i do need His control/rules/boundries but at times its just not an easy thing do. Written with permission and at the request of MasterBLU.