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	SD! : Web boards : Practical IE : "Psychological need for take down scenes." 1 2 3 4 Psychological need for take down scenes. (35) 9 May 08, 4:36 PM 000-810-743 US, 4 yrs Greetings, Intentional Cruelty and Jake's emma; i would strongly agree with both of the cautions you posted, but would hope that the Master/Mistress/Fillintheblank would have already covered these bases with their su/sl/p. To engage in mental play (after all, i'd say 2/3 of the power from a take-down scene is emotional/mental) really requires knowing the inner tickings of the slave. Not having a thorough knowledge of the history, reactions and mental health is much like embarking on wax play and not knowing the melting temps of various waxes. Physical safety is important to both the Master and slave, and this heavy burden lies mainly on the Master's shoulders. Once fully immersed in a take-down, i fight viciously until fully restrained, and have been known to go for throat, eyes and crotch. This is due to triggers from before, and by knowing my past and my mental triggers, He has avoided castration, blindness and a crushed larynx. Before a scene, i would tell myself i'd never harm Him like that, and once the adrenaline has soaked my body, i'm very primal...a force to be reckoned with. It is up to the Master in situations like this to be aware of Their Own safety as well as the slave's safety. What good could come from a scene in which the slave is tied, lashes out and knocks the Master out cold? Ever read Gerald's Game by Stephen King? *shudder* Obielax, i like your acronym SNAG. Sir N could relate...He was raised in a household run by His mother, who drilled in the respect (as socially expected) for women, you never hit a girl, blahblah yaddayadda. He had a lot to shed and a lot to learn, but He did and is much happier for it. It was hard for Him too, striking me, being forceful and even painful to me, but knowing that i needed it and He needed to give it really helped Him overcome. Jake's emma, i'd love to talk to you on the otherside about the psychological aspects of take-downs and past issues...would you memo me if acceptable? Be well everyone, and walk tall; slave tora, devoted to Sir N 10 May 08, 2:42 AM obielax US(OH), 9 mths Y! 000-810-743 wrote: Greetings, Intentional Cruelty and Jake's emma; (((SNIP))) Obielax, i like your acronym SNAG. Sir N could relate...He was raised in a household run by His mother, who drilled in the respect (as socially expected) for women, you never hit a girl, blahblah yaddayadda. He had a lot to shed and a lot to learn, but He did and is much happier for it. It was hard for Him too, striking me, being forceful and even painful to me, but knowing that i needed it and He needed to give it really helped Him overcome. (((SNIP))) Be well everyone, and walk tall; slave tora, devoted to Sir N Thank you slave tora, Hello all. I was raised in a old fashioned extended family (I'm the seventh generation from the same town.) that had many strong matriarcil (sp?) figures and long before I met my pet I have been following a Gaia based belief system. (Love your global mommy!) I am trying to find my way through all that blahblah and yaddayadda myself and would welcome input from your Sir or any one else who has made that journey either in thread or in memo. One of my challanges is O/our size diffrence. (picture the bear and the pussy cat.) The combnation of my strength and her preexisting joint damage (20 year old auto accident) leaves me with a very small margen between tickleing and more lasting damage to my cherished pet. Obielax Say what you mean, mean what you say. 10 May 08, 7:43 PM Lord_of_Winter US(NY), 20 mths jakesemma wrote: So, the discussion question at hand is, why is there a need for take down scenes? Does anyone else relate to this need? Do other Masters understand what I am talking about in reference to this behavior, and why it works this way for a slave (not just me specifically.) Yes, I totally relate to this. I think a take-down 'scene' is the expression of dominance and submission, and it scratches an itch deep down in the reptile brain. It's the overt expression of control. That it is a 'scene' implies that both parties understand that they're engaged in it because it is a mutually enjoyable experience, and satisfying to both parties; but that it does not imply a lack of love or respect, but a deepening of these things. It certainly adds to our quality and enjoyment of life, and our freedom from social constraints in the favor of increased happiness and exploration of our natures. 10 May 08, 8:18 PM Mistress_Tiara UK, 2 yrs I have a thought on this which relates to people who have been physically harmed or threatened in the past. Perhaps the need for this sort of thing is a desire to experience 'violence' and 'force' within a safe context, thus overwriting any previous traumas of this nature and allowing the submissive to know that even in a violently revisited situation ie one that is like something they have suffered in a *genuinely* violent and frightening context, their Dominant will not harm them, so the outcome cannot be the same as in the original attack. I have a theory that for some people who have experienced violent trauma, they may have a need to experience the *intensity* of the old damaging situation again, minus the original outcome of permanent damage. In this way they also actively test their Owners safety in a way that means something to them on the same primal level the original trauma did. Just My personal little thoughts. And for the record this in no way specifically aimed at you, emma *~*Mistress Tiara*~* 10 May 08, 8:22 PM jakesemma US(WA), 15 mths Y! Mistress_Tiara wrote: I have a thought on this which relates to people who have been physically harmed or threatened in the past. Perhaps the need for this sort of thing is a desire to experience 'violence' and 'force' within a safe context, thus overwriting any previous traumas of this nature and allowing the submissive to know that even in a violently revisited situation ie one that is like something they have suffered in a *genuinely* violent and frightening context, their Dominant will not harm them, so the outcome cannot be the same as in the original attack. I have a theory that for some people who have experienced violent trauma, they may have a need to experience the *intensity* of the old damaging situation again, minus the original outcome of permanent damage. In this way they also actively test their Owners safety in a way that means something to them on the same primal level the original trauma did. Just My personal little thoughts. And for the record this in no way specifically aimed at you, emma LOL even if it is not, if the shoe fits! I do think in many ways BDSM can help heal past violent traumas if the people invovled trust each other... for every negative, you need 10 positives to over write it. Also, for someone who likes intensity, and feeling that way, having it be always ending on a positive note in a safe enviroment makes it so that need gets met with out worry... I do think in some ways its therupitic, even if it is just used as a stress reliever.... to fight and get all that negative energy out... You could run, you could do yoga, or lots of other physical activities.. but me, personally, his hands, on my flesh, biting into my skin.. nothing fixes me the way he does LOL Edited 10 May 08, 8:24 PM by jakesemma 11 May 08, 2:29 PM slave_morgan US(CT), 8 mths jakesemma wrote: Mistress_Tiara wrote: I have a thought on this which relates to people who have been physically harmed or threatened in the past. Perhaps the need for this sort of thing is a desire to experience 'violence' and 'force' within a safe context, thus overwriting any previous traumas of this nature and allowing the submissive to know that even in a violently revisited situation ie one that is like something they have suffered in a *genuinely* violent and frightening context, their Dominant will not harm them, so the outcome cannot be the same as in the original attack. I have a theory that for some people who have experienced violent trauma, they may have a need to experience the *intensity* of the old damaging situation again, minus the original outcome of permanent damage. In this way they also actively test their Owners safety in a way that means something to them on the same primal level the original trauma did. Just My personal little thoughts. And for the record this in no way specifically aimed at you, emma LOL even if it is not, if the shoe fits! I do think in many ways BDSM can help heal past violent traumas if the people invovled trust each other... for every negative, you need 10 positives to over write it. Also, for someone who likes intensity, and feeling that way, having it be always ending on a positive note in a safe enviroment makes it so that need gets met with out worry... I do think in some ways its therupitic, even if it is just used as a stress reliever.... to fight and get all that negative energy out... You could run, you could do yoga, or lots of other physical activities.. but me, personally, his hands, on my flesh, biting into my skin.. nothing fixes me the way he does LOL You both completely clarified this for me. i might just pass this along to my Master, it definitely applies to O/our situation. Thank you 11 May 08, 8:06 PM Mistress_Tiara UK, 2 yrs My pleasure *~*Mistress Tiara*~* 11 May 08, 9:40 PM slavejenna US(TN), 12 mths Oh my, for the first I think someone can put into words what I haven't been able to understand or to communicate to my Master. Thank you so much for your words here. I have been raped and abused in the past and I have never understood why I NEED my Master's dominance and even crave the "take down". For a long time I have really thought something was wrong with me and I've felt so guilty. I've thought that if my Master knew I had these feelings in someway he might think that I had asked for the previous abuse. I've never been able to open up to him on this topic and it has hurt him deeply. You have opened a door for me and I thank you. M's slave 11 May 08, 10:50 PM Mistress_Tiara UK, 2 yrs I dont think you should feel guilty. People use whatever coping tools they can. Ive had this theory for a long time but never mentioned it before. *~*Mistress Tiara*~* 17 May 08, 10:14 PM 953-171-915 22 mths Your post and questions are truly appreciated on this topic. It certainly helped me to not feel so alone. i have never heard of the term 'take down'. Is take down different than breaking a girl? Is 'take down' a form of maintenance for a submissive? By the way, i completely understand and agree that begging for this and having a set *scene* in mind or a scenario or a list of wants in this would not be satisfying for what feelings you have described that seem similar to what i go through from time to time...to time to time...and more times...LOL Sometimes i think i exhibit specific cues to alert my Master i am feeling needy of this 'take down'. my Master rarely picks up on them. Then i am quiet about it and just try to forget about it. Then it ends up with me acting out. That gets me punished. Punishment, i have found, does not leave me with that feeling i had been seeking in the first place. The strange thing is, last night i did just that. i was frustrated with Him not picking up on my cues and then i just acted out. i am internally humiliated by my actions, because now i look back and think i wasn't cute; instead, i was annoying, unappealing, and unpleasing. *sigh* i was sent to the corner and my Owner is planning full punishment. i fear the punishment. It wasn't the feeling or "scene" i was bargaining and internally screaming for. The importance of explaining my misbehavior from last night and the punishment is to further ask, if this take down maintenance is not implimented on a semi regular basis, does a slave become well...less slave...or annoying..or misbehaved? Again, thank you for the post. It will give me something to think deeply about. -His pet Next page