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	SD! : Web boards : Practical IE : "LDR" LDR (4) Mon 7 Jul 08, 5:03 PM Remoses US(PA), 3 yrs  I have been puzzling over the concept of a long distance relationship. Normally, I would be quick to condemn such things as some silly “dress-up” game that has no basis in reality. In fact, I used to read about such things and I would scoff at them as so much stuff and nonsense. How could it be that a person in one part of the country could hope to actually enslave a person in a distant part of the country? Or in another country? Impossible, I would have said. I have been accused of many things and being arrogant is certainly one of them. I suppose that is why I'm so damned charming! I had always held that in order to maintain a real relationship with someone it required that the parties at least be able to share the same room! At least on occasion! Oh, and also I held that people who were not cohabitants were also falling short of My perception of true enslavement. It seemed that if a couple could not actually live together, it was impossible to develop and share the bond of Ownership. I had many reasons for feeling this way. Being dogmatic may have been the strongest, though. I had My way, and everything else was not even close to being acceptable. I was so tempted to shoot My mouth off and fire a broadside at the “posers” that I felt were not really living the life…I guess I should be happy that I refrained from doing that… I have recently come to regard the whole notion of a long distance relationship a bit differently. I am perhaps a bit less dogmatic and a bit more flexible. I guess even an old coot like Me can grow up every now and then. I hope that is the case. We shall see. Some of you may recall that I had a long and vociferous dialogue about the time I was planning on bringing a slave into our home. I defended My plans with a vengance. I would broach no argument to the contrary. So certain was I in My plans, that I was confident to the point of arrogance that I would prevail. It turns out that I was wrong. Yep, you read that right. I was wrong. Our adventure with a slave in My house was doomed to failure. The failures were abundant and the blame can be spread around widely. I am certainly willing to admit My mistakes…I made plenty of them. Of course, the fundamental problem was that we had not clearly laid out all of our expectations and we had not fully investigated the whole compatibility issue. And believe Me, the question of compatibility can not be understated. That's a big deal. Well, to return to the purpose of this posting, I want to address something that occurred to Me recently…and not so recently, really. I have maintained a conversation with a person, some distance from Me with whom I found a great deal of simpatico. This slave's personality and Mine seem to find a very comfortable fit, almost immediately. But for several reasons, we always kept our relationship somewhat in abeyance for the entirely of our conversations. Recently, something changed. We've grown closer and our need for one another has taken on a new urgency. Now wouldn't you know it, this slave is some great distance from Me. But through the miracle of e-mail and long distance telephone conversations… (Thank you AT&T and thank you Vonage!) we have begun to develop a closeness that was quite surprising. I could not be more surprised. And you know what? Although it is inconvenient, this distance between us, it seems it is not insurmountable. In our pursuit of all of this, I find that I am entirely taken by the prospect of this relationship. I am impressed at how comfortable this has become…I find that I'm making plans to travel. And travel these days is a misery that I would not want to wish upon My worst enemy! But I am thinking of traveling… So, once again, it seems that I was wrong. You cannot know how it pains Me to admit this! My arrogance is legendary…even if I am the only one who is aware of the “legend”! I am just full of Myself to think that I should be right all the time. And yet, I was wrong. Well, although I am here, and this slave is there, it seems that we are nonetheless connected. I am happy to have this and this slave seems content to serve Me. I now begin a new adventure. I seek to find a way to reconcile the seeming contradictions of My arrogance and the humility that I have to learn from the admission of My mistakes. Let us just hope that I have ceased to make mistakes…I cannot bear to be proven wrong excessively! I am Remoses. Just because it's inconvenient, doesn't mean it's not required. Quod principi placet legis habet vigorem (The pleasure of the prince has the force of law.) **Pronounce it: Ray-mosay.** Edited Tue 8 Jul 08, 12:55 PM by Remoses 7 Jul 08, 5:19 PM anjuli UK, 16 mths  <laughs and sends an e-hug to our oh so modest friend!> I am laughing and sympathetic all at once, you grouchy old so and so! Good for you. I'm sorry things didn't work out with, morgan, wasn't it? You were all very brave in dealing with that here and it didn't go unnoticed I am sure. I had a more open mind because I came to this world thro the medium of the internet and so experienced the power of online communications. I would say that it's a rare beast that can enslave or be enslaved at long distance but the basis of a D/s or M/s relationship I certainly believe can be built. The more intuitive and open the parties are the better the bond and the faster things can go but I do believe there's a limit. Whatever, it's good to hear that old dogs can learn new tricks and what's more, be decent enough to say so. Hope things go better this time. I know you will have learned a lot and will approach things differently but I hope they go well for all of you. Thanks for sharing. anjuli ~~~ “I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” - Anais Nin ~~~ 7 Jul 08, 9:23 PM Remoses US(PA), 3 yrs  Y'know, I am happy enough with My life and I wanted to place this here to share a thought. I really do not need encouragement as I am just an asshole enough to do what I want anyway, regardless of the opinions of others. Nonetheless, thank you all for your kind words. I hope I do not appear to be dismissive. I just want to provoke a little discussion, that's all. I am Remoses. Just because it's inconvenient, doesn't mean it's not required. Quod principi placet legis habet vigorem (The pleasure of the prince has the force of law.) **Pronounce it: Ray-mosay.** 7 Jul 08, 11:27 PM DarkSado US(NY), 10 mths  Remoses wrote: Y'know, I am happy enough with My life and I wanted to place this here to share a thought. I really do not need encouragement as I am just an asshole enough to do what I want anyway, regardless of the opinions of others. Nonetheless, thank you all for your kind words. I hope I do not appear to be dismissive. I just want to provoke a little discussion, that's all. I am Remoses. I think that we all change our concept of M/s, D/s, and how We live it over time, Our thoughts on what it should be and Our tolerance of Others beliefs. I Was very rigid in My belief that a Master or Dominant and Their slave/sub should be live-in. I've come to accept that this is not always wanted or can be possible in many situations. For Me, I need Real Time/Live In. But, then... To each Dom & Master, Their own. DarkSado 8 Jul 08, 6:24 AM 238-864-563 US(CA), 11 mths  i have no history with your previous postings and therefore make no comment about them. i have also had the same feelings you report in this post that you held and expressed previously, and, like you, i came to change my view. Having the experience does make a difference. That said, i think perhaps another critical difference is that i, and from what you wrote, you do not intend to keep it entirely long distance and without any physical meeting or face to face interaction whatsoever. i believe numerous people who frequent here now or in the past met over the internet initially, with varying degrees of distance separating them. It can be, and apparently often is, that some form of LDR is part of the initial "courtship," if i may use that word rather loosely. That is distinct, however, from some i have read or heard about who have remained exclusively in such a relationship for numerous years (e.g. 6) without ever meeting face to face. Just my 2 cents. 238-864-563 Edited 8 Jul 08, 6:26 AM by 238-864-563