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SD! : Web boards : Discipline : "I have a question..."
1 2 3 4

I have a question... (31)

3 Aug 08, 7:58 AM
slavetakara
3 yrs

I have been on extreme side of a Master loosing control.

i agree with saying "if furniture gets broken, eventualy people get broken" it truth its only a matter of when not if.

I think when a Master loosing control. to point it become phyicaly violent, which is either directed towards another person. be that punching funiture. basicly thats someone saying. i want to hit you right now. but i am trying to restrain myself. but one day that restrain may not be there or something may push him over thresh hold of that restraint.

i do want to tell you what to do.

but would take long hard look at what your getting out of relationship and if that worth the risk of someone hurting your child or you self. in what could become a dangerous and uncontroled phyical situation.

takara

Edited 3 Aug 08, 8:01 AM by slavetakara

4 Aug 08, 6:15 AM
little_linnet
US, 3 yrs

Lord_Laraby wrote:
You wouldn't want to be doing BDSM with an out-of-control (due to binge drinking or whatever) Master, so why would Amo want to be doing it with a Out-of-control (due to PMS or whatever) sub?

There's a major, MAJOR difference between the two and that is that it's an owner's job to be in control and to impose control.

Krista

So we are not supposed to write about our own experiences on the basis that it might make someone else feel inadequate? Sorry, but bollocks!

4 Aug 08, 12:34 PM
anjuli
UK, 18 mths

I'm glad you said that, Krista.

Having said it tho, there is a point at which self-control is an issue for the s-type too. For instance, it can be made a requirement by the M to keep behaviour within certain bounds despite whatever is causing it.

I'm the last person to be unsympathetic about PMS problems. I spent virtually all my adult life struggling with terrible pain and problems... which by the way, after years of being sent away by doctors being told these were just part of life for women and I should go away and cope... turned out to be severe endometriosis the late diagnosis of which resulted in me being faced with an early and total hysterectomy.

So, first... get it checked and don't accept the kind of crap we used to be fobbed off with, and second, once that's done and you know it's just PMS, be aware that there are things you can do. There is the pill, there are other drugs, (antispasmodics, even drugs designed for other purposes that have been shown to help) and there are herbal supplements, vitamins such as B complex and so on that will help. So will eating a small amount of carbohydrate (slow release sugar to help balance blood sugar and so mood and cramps) about every two hours - just a cracker or plain biscuit will do.

J always made it clear that altho I was in real pain - and we're talking hospital admittance and morphine the last time I had a period - taking it out on him was NOT acceptable. He made it clear that I was to do everything I could to take care of myself, to listen to my body and heed messages, to let him know when I needed help and to go to him rather than let it build up and then lose it.

No-one was more surprised than me when I found that I could diffuse the feelings by going to him, kneeling and just telling him what was going on in my head... that I was hurting and feeling aggressive or angry or whatever. No more nastiness... even thro the very worst times I had waiting for my treatment.

I honestly think beauty that there are bigger issues for the two of you in trying to live as M and s, not least HIS anger issues, but these steps might actually help you whatever sort of relationship you're in.

Why not make an agreement that you will both take this sort of step to gaining control and improving your lives? He gets help and learns to deal with anger without physical expression of it and you learn to deal with your own body and moods.

anjuli

~~~ “I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” - Anais Nin ~~~

Edited 4 Aug 08, 12:36 PM by anjuli

12 Aug 08, 3:11 AM
427-222-624
US, 2 yrs
Y!*
Amo_s_beauty wrote:
I have a question...

Should a slave be punished if a Master loses control and gets angry and the slave gets angry back? Just wondering your opinions? Should a slave also get punished for bad PMS attitudes?

As for the first situation you mentioned, this one believes that a situation like that should be resolved verbally, not physically. As for the second, every Master is different. Don't get me wrong, PMS is a legitimate issue. However, the best thing you could really do is try your best to behave, and if you feel yourself losing your cool, respectfully warn your Master of your mood changing, and maybe ask for a moment to yourself to cool down.

Hope that helps! =)

"Sometimes you wake up, sometimes the fall kills you, and sometimes when you fall, you fly.."

12 Aug 08, 6:35 AM
MasterJC
5 mths
Ms_Valentine wrote:
PMS is horrible and anyone who thinks it's effects can just be shrugged off or easily controlled does not know or understand how dreadful one can feel.

I am a Mistress so I speak not as a sub trying to help other subs but as a woman explaining to any men who may not be aware that PMS is not just feeling a bit cranky.

Yesterday I was feeling sick all day. My breasts hurt so that even touching them made me wince. My back ached, my head throbbed. I felt dizzy, tired and bloated up beyond belief. All of this means that is if I was a sub I would be out of action during those days of PMS as surely as if I had a bad cold or a migraine.

If my sub suffered similar symptoms once a month, I would be very careful to look after him and treat him with kindness and care.

There are quite a few herbals that can be used to help...feverfeww is one of them...it is a major ingredient in 'sanugram' made in the uk for migraine relief but has been shown as a good herbal for this issue as well...

hope this little bit helps

cheers

MasterJC

12 Aug 08, 6:40 AM
MasterJC
5 mths
slavetakara wrote:

It is my feeling a slave is a Valued property...if the slave has to lock doors to feel safe or anything of that nature...the Master has broken the trust in the slave.Master relationship...and I agree with the statement below whole heartly...a Master should ALWAYS be in control of themselves as they have taken a serious responsibility by owning a slave...

MasterJc...

I have been on extreme side of a Master loosing control.

i agree with saying "if furniture gets broken, eventualy people get broken" it truth its only a matter of when not if.

I think when a Master loosing control. to point it become phyicaly violent, which is either directed towards another person. be that punching funiture. basicly thats someone saying. i want to hit you right now. but i am trying to restrain myself. but one day that restrain may not be there or something may push him over thresh hold of that restraint.

i do want to tell you what to do.

but would take long hard look at what your getting out of relationship and if that worth the risk of someone hurting your child or you self. in what could become a dangerous and uncontroled phyical situation.

takara

12 Aug 08, 9:11 AM
Ms_Valentine
8 mths
MasterJC wrote:
Ms_Valentine wrote:
PMS is horrible and anyone who thinks it's effects can just be shrugged off or easily controlled does not know or understand how dreadful one can feel.

I am a Mistress so I speak not as a sub trying to help other subs but as a woman explaining to any men who may not be aware that PMS is not just feeling a bit cranky.

Yesterday I was feeling sick all day. My breasts hurt so that even touching them made me wince. My back ached, my head throbbed. I felt dizzy, tired and bloated up beyond belief. All of this means that is if I was a sub I would be out of action during those days of PMS as surely as if I had a bad cold or a migraine.

If my sub suffered similar symptoms once a month, I would be very careful to look after him and treat him with kindness and care.

There are quite a few herbals that can be used to help...feverfeww is one of them...it is a major ingredient in 'sanugram' made in the uk for migraine relief but has been shown as a good herbal for this issue as well...

hope this little bit helps

cheers

MasterJC

Thank you for offering help. Much appreciated. I have tried many conventional and 'alternative' remedies. Unfortunately, my main problem now is that the only things which I have found do work are not allowed because I have epilepsy. Such a nuisance!

12 Aug 08, 12:34 PM
anjuli
UK, 18 mths

Wow! What does epilepsy rule out then MsV? I've tried hundreds of ideas and will gladly share if I've got any not on the 'banned' list. It must make life very difficult - I know it would have done for me.

anjuli

~~~ “I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” - Anais Nin ~~~

12 Aug 08, 12:57 PM
000-874-172
UK, 5 yrs
anjuli wrote:
Wow! What does epilepsy rule out then MsV? I've tried hundreds of ideas and will gladly share if I've got any not on the 'banned' list. It must make life very difficult - I know it would have done for me.

anjuli

Epilepsy stops ya taking a great many things; the thing is though, it depends how bad and what type of epilepsy you're dealing with, and what you're taking for it to indicate against the proposed new medication or OTC drugs.

(remembering both My Girl and I are epileptic too..)

When thinking of medications or remedies that say 'don't take' because you're epileptic, or they have a side effect of convulsions, if, for example the medication you're talking about has to be taken regularly, then it'd be a problem because you'd have a build-up effect and more likely seize over use of them;

If, on the other hand, it was just something like a painkiller (Tramadol comes to mind that My Girl has been prescribed), an epileptic can't take those regularly (because they'd build up and may well cause her to seize), but it's perfectly OK to take them for a headache or, say, bad period pains once in a while.

A lot of the time, when looking at these things, we have to be aware that the companies making the medications and OTC remedies in the first place are just covering their own backs so they don't get sued. The chances of an epileptic becoming ill for one dose of 'anything' is remote in any case, unless it directly contra-indicates with their normal medicines.

Of course, caution is always advisable, but it'd be a shame to think someone (here) might not be getting some relief from something potentially useful just because they 'think' they can't take 'one', against a whole box over time - there's a massive difference.

Master's l'il one®(her Rights are Mine in reserve)

12 Aug 08, 1:35 PM
anjuli
UK, 18 mths

Well true... but PMS is, when it's a problem, every four freakin weeks and lasts a week on average! I personally took enough bloody OTC medicines and painkillers to stun an ox I suspect so I'm thinking it would pose a problem.

When we're talking about pain killers, it's keeping on top of the pain that's they key, especially the cramping type of pain that comes with periods. So one is not a lot of good. See what I mean?

Tramodol is a good drug and I swallowed loads of it last year pre and post operatively as they tried to find something that would control the pain and let me function. The idea was to avoid me killing myself by ODing on paracetamol and codeine in an attempt to get up once in a while, I think! <rolls eyes> But I had some weird side effects. Got used to them but watch her being dizzy and look out for hallucinations (sorry for the pun) I got pretty nasty nightmares each time I restarted the stuff.

You're right about the seizing tho... it's a risk with tramodol... the aussies are not prescribing it in your girl's situation any more from what I have read so be careful and stay in touch with your doc huh?

anjuli

~~~ “I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” - Anais Nin ~~~

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