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	SD! : Web boards : Submission : " how do i stop messing up" how do i stop messing up (3) Sat 20 Sep 08, 9:11 AM 907-607-606 UK, 7 mths  Hello there everybody just need to ask how do i stop messing up when talking to my Master? He released me from my collar last July because he reckons I have issues over my attitudes and reactions to the lifestyle. I enjoy the lifestyle and miss it not beenwith Master since July he told me it was over but then it would appear that it is not over or maybe again now it is. I am very jealous of him which perhaps is not necessarily a good thing in a submissive and miss him terribly and find it hard to cope without his control. He has lost rust in me because he says that i lie to him. Has any other sub/slave lied to their Masters? When i chat to him I always mess up because i start to get vitrionic about the fact that he has 'thrown me away' but then it would seem that he has not. I am starting my physcho sexual therapy in October and somehow cant seem to wait for that before i ask him to take me back. He says to wait and see how the therapy goes. I do have many issued with myself and am keen to get them sorted out. I have accused him of being with another sub/slave he says he has not but now he is going to because he deserves better than me. I think he might well the way I feel about me at the moment. Any suggestions because i do want to be his again 20 Sep 08, 11:33 AM morgan US(WA), 16 mths  that is something you and him have to talk with eachother about.you have to be ready and cofident that you can surrender yourself to him and he has to be sure he either wants you or not. 20 Sep 08, 2:32 PM SurrogateFamily 4 mths  907-607-606 wrote: Hello there everybody just need to ask how do i stop messing up when talking to my Master? Have a Master that you respect and trust; usually because they communicate with you well. 907-607-606 wrote: I am very jealous of him which perhaps is not necessarily a good thing in a submissive Jealous: "Fearful or wary of being supplanted; apprehensive of losing affection or position". It's a destructive thing in anyone; a vicious circle: the more jealous you are, the less desirable you are. These relationships are particularly dependent on trust. 907-607-606 wrote: He has lost rust in me because he says that i lie to him. Has any other sub/slave lied to their Masters? Have you? Trust is like glass (my mirror analogy again: you and your Master are each others reflection) you only get to break it once. 907-607-606 wrote: When i chat to him I always mess up because i start to get vitrionic about the fact that he has 'thrown me away' but then it would seem that he has not. It sounds like he is not giving you clear signals about his feelings or intentions - and you need them. 907-607-606 wrote: I have accused him of being with another sub/slave Is this outside of the limits you've both agreed on? Statistics would imply that monogamy is something you can't force people to do. The best way to keep someone with you is by helping them enjoy being with you; especially at parting moments. 907-607-606 wrote: he says he has not but now he is going to because he deserves better than me. Perhaps if he communicated more with you, helped you to trust him, and was able to belay your outbursts, things would have been different too. 907-607-606 wrote: I think he might well the way I feel about me at the moment. There are always an infinite number of "what if"s and both parties here sound like they're simply not well matched. 907-607-606 wrote: Any suggestions because i do want to be his again How many potential Masters have you known? "Being his" could be a fixation rather than a future. Would being someone else's lower your self-esteem? From these few words, the impression is that neither of you are able to cope the other! That isn't a healthy place to start. I would hope that you find someone who makes you melt when you approach them; who could calm you with a look; who you'd go you the ends of the earth with no matter what their behaviour. But in this case, just find someone else, for a break! I hope things all turn out in the end, for both of you. 22 Sep 08, 12:34 AM Authority UK, 4 yrs  I hope things work out for you too, but this doesn't sound great. It's difficult to know the rights and wrongs (you say he's accused you of lying to him, but you don't tell us whether you did actually lie), but I also think you'd be better focusing on yourself and your feelings, and what you want and need from a man, than you would just desperately trying to get him back. It's a problem that you don't know whether he's let you go or not: I think you should absolutely and unmistakeably know whether or not you're owned. If you're not his, then he shouldn't want you for sex; if he does want you for sex, that's not proof that he wants you. As for the jealousy thing, you obviously don't trust him, which again is a problem.