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SD! :
SD! Wiki : Submissive : history
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Submissive
A person who prefers to be subordinate in a D/s relationship, obeying,
serving, and pleasing
their Dominant partner. Submissive is the broadest
term in the
submissive/slave/property panoply. All slaves are submissives and all
who describe
themselves as property are submissives but not all submissives are
slaves or property of an
owner. Self-describing as a submissive does not necessarily mean that
the person already
has a dominant. Instead, submissive describes a preference for taking
the submissive role in
a relationship or in a bdsm scene and operates as a type of
self-description or self-advertisement.
The term bottom is in turn a more general than
"submissive", and also includes people who take a passive role in
BDSM activities that don't include obedience or service.
The everyday definition of the word "submissive" is: "characterized by
tendencies to yield to
the will or authority of others" (Merriam-Webster). The bdsm and M/s
definition of
submissive differs from the everyday definition of submissive in the
following ways:
- Submissive in BDSM and the Ownership Subculture is commonly used
as a noun and this is a correct usage within this subculture.
- The word submissive in the BDSM world is considerably more
protean than the
ordinary use of the word. Submissive in the everyday sense is an
adjective describing a fixed
personality feature exhibited in all interactions with others. In the
vanilla world "submissive"
commonly refers to a set of traits that is manifested whenever the
person interacts with
anyone. Within BDSM or the Ownership Subculture the word "submissive"
refers only to that
person's relationship to their own dominant or potential dominants they
wish to form a
relationship with. In other words, some very non-submissive people in
the vanilla world
commonly describe themselves as submissive when referring to their
relationship with a
dominant or when describing themselves in the BDMS or Ownership Subculture.
Differences between submissives and slaves
Within much of the Ownership Subculture, submissive is used as a
counter-example to the term
"slave". Submissives are described as people who have rights within
their D/s relationship,
including the right and ability to leave if the relationship becomes
difficult or unpleasant.
Within a D/s relationship submissives may have the ability to negotiate
the terms of their
submission on a moment to moment basis and have expectations of their
owner on how they
should be treated. These expectations are taken very seriously by both
the dominant and the
submissive. They may be described in a written document which both
parties are expected to
adhere to or they may be verbal agreements that are subject to frequent
re-negotiations.See also
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